How to survive the holidays with your spouse when you’re ready for a divorce

How to survive the holidays with your spouse when you’re ready for a divorce

It’s not unusual for couples who already know that they want a divorce to wait until after the holidays to start the process. Some of them simply don’t want the kids to associate the holiday season with their parents’ divorce. Others dread the thought of dealing with the social consequences of a holiday breakup.

Whatever your reasons for waiting, one thing is certain: Getting through the holidays without erupting into a battle with your spouse can be tough.

Tips for managing holidays when you’re ready to call quits on your marriage

Here are four things you can do to make the next few weeks a little easier:

  1. Focus on what’s important. If you have children, that means pouring your energy into making the holidays happy and memorable. If you can keep your spouse focused on the same thing, it may lead to fewer disputes.
  2. Practice plenty of self-care. That means different things to different people. In your situation, self-care may include things like skipping the annual holiday dinner at your in-laws and letting your spouse take the kids without you.
  3. Express your appreciation when appropriate. If your spouse has called a “time out” for the season or is being cooperative (for now), let them know you are grateful. It doesn’t have to change your decision, but it does make things more bearable right now.
  4. Stay in the moment. You can (and should) gather up your financial records and take stock of your divorce goals, but you shouldn’t focus on them right now. Concentrate on enjoying each day as it comes until you’re ready to take the next steps.

Ending your marriage is never a pleasant process, but the right planning and attitude can see you through the process without unnecessary complications. Once you’re ready, a family lawyer here in Michigan can help.

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